Take a picture of yourself right now. Don’t change your clothes. Don’t fix your hair. Just take a picture. Post that picture with no editing. (Except maybe to get the image size down to something reasonable. Don’t go posting an eight megapixel image.) Include these instructions.
I had to use the camera on my phone because Bogna's gone off somewhere with my camera, but anyway. Look upon the face of hutch, ye mighty, and despair. God I need a haircut.